Don't stare too long, it'll have an adverse effect on you.

Your real name

see above

Your location(ish)

Midwest USA

Your marriage/family situation

married

Own website (if you have one!)

N/A

The Interview:

You're a poster in a.a.f - do you actually own a Ferrari or are you just here for the insults?

No Ferrari, although I'm looking at Ducatis and Guzzis right now

What do you do to scratch out a living?

tech support and parts sales for drag racing (no wiseass comments, Duffin)

Who would play you in a movie?

I'd be myself, who does it better?

What is your favourite sport?

-

Which team/player do you follow?

-

What and where is your favourite Hotel

Red Roof Inn, they give you a free paper...

What and where is your favourite restaurant or bar?

Do they serve beer? Do they have good chicken wings? Is there a pool table? That'll be the one then...

Name a few of your favourite books?

"The Eight", by Katherine Neville, "Wolves of the Calla" (among many, many others) by Stephen King, "Superbikes of the Seventies" by Roland Brown, there's too many too do a decent list...

Name a few of your favourite films?

Ronin, Mad Max, Office Space, Billy Madison (it's not high art, or is it..?)

What music do you listen to?

The Dead Kennedys, Motorhead, Eazy-E, Sir Mix-A-Lot, Juliana Hatfield, Mozart, David Allen Coe, Hank Williams Jr., Rob Zombie... Just about everything but techno and new country, and I'd listen to techno more if I knew anything about it.

Heaven is...?

waking up next to my wife every morning

Hell is...?

going to the dentist

Name four people (dead or alive) that you would like to invite to a dinner party.

George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, George Patton, Alexander the Great

If you had to get stranded in one place for the rest of your life (town, city, tropical island, whatever) where would it be?

An island with a racetrack.

Who would you take with you?

my wife, of course

If you there was one car or bike that you could drive just once, what would it be?

easy, 1952 Vincent Black Lightning for the bike, and for the car I'd take any pre-1975 front-engine ferrari, whether it be a Lusso, Superfast, 330GTC, whatever.

What is your secret vice?

well, it's no secret: beer and chicken wings...

What irritates you most about people?

the way most people seem unable to put themselves in another's position, instead choosing to obsess over themselves

Do you know what love is?

cue Forrest Gump: "I'm not a smart man Jenny, but ah know what love is."

Is the glass half full, or half empty?

Is there beer in it?

What's in the glass?

I'm asking you!

What's the one thing you never leave home without?

spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch Oh wait, that's four.

and finally, complete the following sentence:
"Arguing in newsgroups is like..."

having a small weiner contest, nobody's really the "winner".